Wednesday, October 24, 2007

I am MOTHER OF THE YEAR!!!!

No matter how hard you try to figure out your kids, they will ALWAYS surprise you. I learned this lesson again today while dining at McDonalds with some gals from my mops group. A great time was had by all. There were about 10 kids between the 4 of us although it seemed like about 25. Us ladies were busy gabbing, while ignoring the chaos around us when my cell phone rings. Normally in a situation like this I would not answer the phone as it is loud and it looks really bad when your kid is running nuts and you are on the phone. Today though I did not recognize the number and thought to myself I better take this.
This is the interesting part. On the other end of the phone is Mrs. Kitchenmaster (yes that is her real name) the school nurse at my kids school. I knew immediately this call was pertaining to Tyler because Jacob NEVER goes to the nurse. She begins to tell me that Tyler has a stomach ache. I said ok, should I come get him? Here is where it gets funny..... She says, " well Mrs. Jeeninga, he says that he has been having stomach aches every morning and that he doesn't get breakfast. We, here at school, offer free breakfast and lunch to all kids if you are having trouble. I will send home the application for you with Tyler today. We gave him some cereal this morning and have also offered him some lunch." At this point, I am having a hard time holding my composure. I explained to Mrs. Kitchenmaster that my children are offered a quality, high protein breakfast every morning and a lunch is packed for them every day except Friday when they buy lunch with the money put on their lunch accounts. While I can appreciate her acting on the information provided by my now grounded, attention seeking child, really we are doing ok and are fully able to provide food for our children. And then it goes on....." have their been any problems or changes at home in the past weeks that could be causing this. Because you know often times stomach aches are just a cover up for deeper emotional issues. Or maybe he is having trouble with someone at school? Have you discussed this with him?" "Not as of yet" I replied," but I have every intention of TALKING to him when I see him. In fact, how about I come pick him up now and see if we can get to the bottom of this while it is still fresh." So off I go to the school to pick up Tyler. Now I am angry, embarrassed, and finding all of this a little bit funny. I am doing my very best to temper my sarcasm and act like a grown up now when I enter the school. Camden had just cried himself to sleep when I pulled up in front of the school so I decide to leave him in the car while I run quickly in to get Ty. Samuel follows me in and as I am opening the door, I realize he has no coat on and no shoes because he took them off in the car. Normally I would not care too much about this, but my ability to provide for my children has already been called into question once today and to be honest with you, once a day is plenty for me. So I try to run back to the car to get his shoes at least, when the secretary hit the button and inadvertently buzzed in Samuel. I saw this occurring and turned to run back and catch the door before it locked but I was late. Now I am on one side of the locked door and Samuel is on the other. Bad, very bad. He takes off like a maniac down the hall. I am finally buzzed in when he hits a corner, turns to look at me, and makes the wrong choice. I honestly could hear what was going on in his brain at that moment. He has been wanting to be let loose in that school for 1.5 years now and he saw his chance. In his looking back at me, he knew he shouldn't, but the sinner in him won and off he went. SO at this point, I have a baby locked alone in a car, a shoeless, coat less 4 year old running like a banshee through the halls of the school, and a 6 year old who has convinced the school nurse I don't feed him. I am having a great day. I finally catch up to Sam, who by the mercy of God, must stop at every drinking fountain he encounters. Definitely slows him down a bit. We walk purposefully back to the office to get Tyler, all the while I have a death grip on Samuel's arm. I am busy signing him out, when in comes Mrs. Kitchenmaster. She kindly tells Tyler she hopes he feels better, greets Samuel, informs him it is too cold not to wear a coat ( thankfully she didn't look down at his bare feet) when Tyler asks where Camden is. I try desperately hard to avoid answering this question until we are outside, but it is not one of those days. Samuel (loudly) replies, "Oh mommy locked him in the car" At this point, I do not even bother to reply. I simply gather up my children and head out to the car. Once in the privacy of my car, I began this buffet of emotion. Even the kids asked me if I was crying or laughing, angry or happy. I could not answer this for I was unable to talk. I beelined to Starbucks, got a grande pumpkin latte, and came home to pretend this day never happened. Miraculously, Tyler's stomach ache is gone shortly after arriving home. I have a feeling this is not what the psalmist meant when he said they will rise up and call me blessed!!!

12 comments:

Jen said...

I am wetting my pants. Oh my. You are a mother among mothers.

mylittleducks5 said...

I just linked you from my blog. I am still laughing. With you not at you...oh wait you are not at the laughing point yet...SORRY
:>Michelle

Tammy said...

LOL! I know it isn't polite to laugh when someone has had a bad day but it's hard not to in this case.

Blessings,
Tammy

Tammy said...

I just noticed from your profile that you enjoy The Mark of the Lion series by Francine Rivers. I just finished it...awesome books!

Bill & Melissa said...

I was saying to myself "poor Candi" until Samuel told The Kitchenmaster that you locked Camden in the car. At that point it crossed that fine line between tragedy and comedy.

As I always say, if you can't cry about it, laugh about it!

Now when people say "I'm having one of those days" I will always think of this story.

Hope things are all better and thank you for sharing.

Bill & Melissa said...

I, Bill, posted the above comment by the way.

Kathy said...

I agree one shouldn't laugh, and no I didn't laugh at you, I think laugh is all you can do. What a day! Hey another one for the book!

Bipin Sen said...

Why isn't anyone laughing at you, Candi? Ok.. I'll laugh at you... :-D

Just kidding. This is almost too funny to be true.

Thanks for sharing!!

Tim and Clair said...

I'm laughing with and at you, this is tooo stinking funny for words and picturing each of the little personalities involved is what makes it really funny. So, how long is Tyler grounded for?

Katrina said...

You are so funny, this was one of the best bad day stories I've ever read. I'd love to add you to my "BLOGS I ENJOY" if that's OK with you. I was one that tried to comment the other day but couldn't so I am glad you changed templates.

Homeschool Housewife said...

This is my favorite post ever. Your worst mommy day is hope for the rest of us that we are not alone in our joyful incompetence. I think we have all had day like this one, we might have done different "Mom of the Year" events, but we all get to the end of the day and think, "Thank God this day is over!"

Thanks for the smile! :)

Anonymous said...

Can I just say what a relief to find someone who actually knows what theyre talking about on the internet. You definitely know how to bring an issue to light and make it important. More people need to read this and understand this side of the story. I cant believe youre not more popular because you definitely have the gift.