I am MOTHER OF THE YEAR!!!!

No matter how hard you try to figure out your kids, they will ALWAYS surprise you. I learned this lesson again today while dining at McDonalds with some gals from my mops group. A great time was had by all. There were about 10 kids between the 4 of us although it seemed like about 25. Us ladies were busy gabbing, while ignoring the chaos around us when my cell phone rings. Normally in a situation like this I would not answer the phone as it is loud and it looks really bad when your kid is running nuts and you are on the phone. Today though I did not recognize the number and thought to myself I better take this.
This is the interesting part. On the other end of the phone is Mrs. Kitchenmaster (yes that is her real name) the school nurse at my kids school. I knew immediately this call was pertaining to Tyler because Jacob NEVER goes to the nurse. She begins to tell me that Tyler has a stomach ache. I said ok, should I come get him? Here is where it gets funny..... She says, " well Mrs. Jeeninga, he says that he has been having stomach aches every morning and that he doesn't get breakfast. We, here at school, offer free breakfast and lunch to all kids if you are having trouble. I will send home the application for you with Tyler today. We gave him some cereal this morning and have also offered him some lunch." At this point, I am having a hard time holding my composure. I explained to Mrs. Kitchenmaster that my children are offered a quality, high protein breakfast every morning and a lunch is packed for them every day except Friday when they buy lunch with the money put on their lunch accounts. While I can appreciate her acting on the information provided by my now grounded, attention seeking child, really we are doing ok and are fully able to provide food for our children. And then it goes on....." have their been any problems or changes at home in the past weeks that could be causing this. Because you know often times stomach aches are just a cover up for deeper emotional issues. Or maybe he is having trouble with someone at school? Have you discussed this with him?" "Not as of yet" I replied," but I have every intention of TALKING to him when I see him. In fact, how about I come pick him up now and see if we can get to the bottom of this while it is still fresh." So off I go to the school to pick up Tyler. Now I am angry, embarrassed, and finding all of this a little bit funny. I am doing my very best to temper my sarcasm and act like a grown up now when I enter the school. Camden had just cried himself to sleep when I pulled up in front of the school so I decide to leave him in the car while I run quickly in to get Ty. Samuel follows me in and as I am opening the door, I realize he has no coat on and no shoes because he took them off in the car. Normally I would not care too much about this, but my ability to provide for my children has already been called into question once today and to be honest with you, once a day is plenty for me. So I try to run back to the car to get his shoes at least, when the secretary hit the button and inadvertently buzzed in Samuel. I saw this occurring and turned to run back and catch the door before it locked but I was late. Now I am on one side of the locked door and Samuel is on the other. Bad, very bad. He takes off like a maniac down the hall. I am finally buzzed in when he hits a corner, turns to look at me, and makes the wrong choice. I honestly could hear what was going on in his brain at that moment. He has been wanting to be let loose in that school for 1.5 years now and he saw his chance. In his looking back at me, he knew he shouldn't, but the sinner in him won and off he went. SO at this point, I have a baby locked alone in a car, a shoeless, coat less 4 year old running like a banshee through the halls of the school, and a 6 year old who has convinced the school nurse I don't feed him. I am having a great day. I finally catch up to Sam, who by the mercy of God, must stop at every drinking fountain he encounters. Definitely slows him down a bit. We walk purposefully back to the office to get Tyler, all the while I have a death grip on Samuel's arm. I am busy signing him out, when in comes Mrs. Kitchenmaster. She kindly tells Tyler she hopes he feels better, greets Samuel, informs him it is too cold not to wear a coat ( thankfully she didn't look down at his bare feet) when Tyler asks where Camden is. I try desperately hard to avoid answering this question until we are outside, but it is not one of those days. Samuel (loudly) replies, "Oh mommy locked him in the car" At this point, I do not even bother to reply. I simply gather up my children and head out to the car. Once in the privacy of my car, I began this buffet of emotion. Even the kids asked me if I was crying or laughing, angry or happy. I could not answer this for I was unable to talk. I beelined to Starbucks, got a grande pumpkin latte, and came home to pretend this day never happened. Miraculously, Tyler's stomach ache is gone shortly after arriving home. I have a feeling this is not what the psalmist meant when he said they will rise up and call me blessed!!!

Help

Ok I need help. Ever since redoing my header and layout only about half of my blogger friends can access my comments and links. The odd part is that some can, but others can't. Does anyone know how I can fix this??? I have no problem getting to my links and comments but many others can't. If you can help me but can't tell me because you are one of the ones who cannot comment catch me on myspace or facebook or email me. Thank you for you immediate attention to my computer stupidity:)

More Camden

The long awaited pictures of Camden

Finally, after nearly 3 months, I have pictures of Camden I can post. I must begin with a HUGE thank you to Michelle for taking these awesome pictures and uploading them for me! She does such a great job!! Capturing a 2.5 month old on film is no easy task. His smiles are still so hard to get, his head is still so wobbly, and he gets tired and fussy after a little bit.

Here is our little pumpkin!
Isn't he sweet!!!

He has a very happy looking smile, tongue always up!

This is a picture of what we will be doing Sunday, in the second half, when the Packers are beating the Bears so bad, we might as well take a nap!

I think this is my favorite!! Kind of far away, but so precious!

I hate potty training!!!

I began potty training my first child in 2001. I was eager to prove that a child could be potty trained at the age of 2 if mom was good at her job. Well, if I could have had a glimpse into the next 7 years (and checked my pride) I would have waited a little longer. At that time, Jacob was 2 and Tyler was 6 months. After a year of attempts, Jacob was finally trained. Enter Tyler....I again started at 2 and at 3.7 years old Tyler was finally trained. Enter Sam....I AGAIN began at 2(you'd think I would have learned). Sam is now 4.4 years old and WILL NOT use the toilet. I have been potty training almost non stop for near 7 years and I still have one more to go. At this rate Camden may be using the toilet before his big brother. I have always said to other potty training moms to relax, eventually they get it, don't worry they won't go to kindergarten in diapers. This may not be the case for my precious little one. I am having trouble finding a kindergarten that accepts a child in pull-ups!
As I look back on the last 7 years, I feel like I am in the movie Groundhog Day. Only my day that keeps repeating is full of fluids and smells that would have drove Bill Murray to tears!! I can admit it I AM TERRIBLE AT POTTY TRAINING!!! There is no pride left here. We have every potty chart, chair, and treat ever created and yet they all fail me. I have learned over the potty years that I don't like that which I can't control. I can't make them use the toilet. We have even spent an ENTIRE day in the bathroom. Playing, reading, cleaning. With the big porcelain bowl right there, and still untouched.
So I digress. I have taken advice from every book, friend, doctor, and "potty training expert" out there, but if you have some nugget of help I am all ears. Otherwise PRAY FOR ME!! I am drowning in a literal sea of CRAP!!!!!

In other news, gotta give credit to my friend Mel for my new page. I LOVE IT!!! She is so creative, something else I am not. Although I do have many talents, potty training and creativity are not among them. Thanks Mel for making my blog pretty!!

Full contact sports

In first grade at my children's school, they use a system of colors for behavior. Green is good, blue not so good, yellow even worse, red is very bad. Only once have we had a red. Last year Jacob found a pin on the floor and proceeded to poke his neighbor because "she looked squishy." Drew blood, apparently violating some school policy about weapons. If you know Jacob, you are laughing now. This incident marked the only dropped color for Jacob his whole year of first grade. Enter Tyler....(for those of you with only one or even one and a baby let me just tell you , your second and subsequent children will surprise you often!!). Tyler has been in exactly 3 weeks of first grade and we have had 2 dropped colors already. First one he was trying to "help" someone blink and "accidentally" hit him in the face. When he came home, we discussed why he didn't need to "help" anyone blink and I informed him that God already took care of that by giving us very little control over blinking. This week we had another blue. Sometimes getting a story out of Tyler can be tricky so I dove into this carefully. Here is how the conversation went:

Mom: I see you are on blue today, buddy. What happened?
Tyler: I hit Mallory.
Mom: Oh Tyler you know you aren't supposed to hit, and above all a girl.
Tyler: But mom, we were playing a game.
Mom (thinking it must be tag or something at recess, you know accidents happen and girls are a bit more sensitive): What game were you playing?
Tyler: Tic tac toe
Mom: WHAT???? How on earth would hitting be part of a game of tic tac toe?
Tyler: Well she lost.
Mom: so you hit her??
Tyler: yeah
Mom: Well that is just not acceptable. It is hard enough to lose sometimes and then you go and hit her. Blah, blah, blah..... What got you so upset to hit her if you won?
Tyler: I wasn't mad, when you win you take the other persons arm and say"I win, you lose, now you've got a big bruise."
And that folks, is how tic tac toe became a full contact sport.

DISCLAIMER

I will begin with a disclaimer. I, in no way, intended to be "complaining" in my last post. I have been told that I have a "dry" sense of humor (would the opposite then be a "wet" sense of humor, I would love to hang out with that person) and my story could easily be misunderstood. I simply wanted to express reality. I am very thankful for all that I have and have to do. Actually unloading the dishwasher is a great feat and I am awfully proud of me for accomplishing that.


Anyhow, true to form for me, I got distracted while microwaving a bag of popcorn the other day. Let me just tell you 7 minutes is TOO long. Once I got the small fire out, we were good to go. Or so I thought. Every thing I put in my microwave now tastes like burnt popcorn. Does anyone know how to eradicate that??? My microwave burrito just isn't the same anymore!!